Day 2 of the return to work torture and I am already exhausted.
The day starts when I wake up late and don't even get to work till 9.45am. I get there to find out I had a 9am meeting with all the new staff who were recruited while I was away. What a great impression I made. I reschedule to 11.30am after my 10am meeting which is about to start and I haven't even grabbed a coffee yet.
I tell my 3 meeting buddies that I have till 11am for them to dazzle me. I watch the clock like a hawk and shut down the meeting with the precision of a guillotine. Three men scatter in surprise. I have no time for pleasantries today...yes my holiday was wonderful...no I am not happy to be back...yes I will read your crap reports (never), yes I am busy see-ya-later...SLAM!
I have 30 minutes to think about how I am going to restore my reputation with the newbies. The phone rings. I am asked to contact a client and apologise for our office's stuff up on a case that has been dragging for months. I wasn't even here but strangely I really like this task. I do it immediately. I feel better after. I know I do the humility thing with the clients well. I do it well because I believe it when I do it. I don't believe in getting defensive with them. If we fucked up then we should say so. I like these calls with clients because it opens the door for me to say sorry but more importantly to explain our humanness to them. As a member of the bureaucracy for 24 years I hate that people still think public servants have it easy. We work hard. I work like a dog. The public needs to know that and they will only know that if I can get them on the phone and tell them.
I hang up at 11.29am. One of the newbies is at the door. The rest follow. I do my thing. 2of them look a bit nervous. One doesn't care coz she is leaving in 2 weeks anyway. The fourth looks like she really really has an opinion and is looking for an opening. I give it to her. She starts to talk...and talk...and talk. I try to cut in but she keeps talking. I let her finish. My next sentence is:
"I don't know if they told you but I am happy to listen to your opinions only if you will take a breath and let me participate. Also, since I am your boss, if I start speaking you start listening." This didn't dissuade her. So the next line from me is "your opinions are good but I do things by the book and I don't care what happened in the office you came from - this is my territory so listen and learn."
I don't think I made 4 new friends today. It doesn't matter. I am over that phase where as a boss I want to be liked. That weakens me. They don't want to like me they want to respect me and trust me. The only way that will happen is after they see me work. I can wait.
It is now noon. I have another meeting at 2.30pm. I break open the lunch box and head to the kitchen for a fork. No forks! NO FORKS! I spent $100 before I left on new cutlery for the office. Where the eff is it? My admin officer offers me hers. I am pissed off again.
The next two and a half hours evaporates as I fly through the files and memos on my desk. All of a sudden it is 2.30. My meeting is convening behind me. I turn and start.
3.30pm - I have a headache. I get an email telling me a piece of work is overdue. I am on the intercom demanding explanations from my guys. I write back and advise head office they will have it in half an hour. They get it in 15 minutes.
3.45pm another email that 2 pieces of work are overdue - I JUST FREAKING GOT BACK!! Didn't anyone notice I wasn't here for 10 months? I grab the files and process them on the database. I get an email "thank you we have them now". Yeah you're welcome.
4.15 I want to go home. I have glazed over. I am talking to one of my staff and I just zone out. She asks me a question. I shake my head to snap myself out of it and vertigo hits me.
4.30 - I want to go home. I'll just print meeting minutes for tomorrow morning's meeting. I hope I don't forget to come in on time. I see an email I don't need - delete. I see another - delete.
5.30 - I have deleted about 520 emails. Suddenly I feel better. I have left emails from colleagues I like so I can open them and read them. I open the first, she is welcoming me back and wanting to catch up for a coffee. Apparently I have been missed. I get all warm and fuzzy. The next one is even better and she has added a pic of a gorgeous bunch of flowers. There is a third and a fourth. All my angst melts away. I shut down the PC and get in the car. Driving home I am happy.
It is strange how even on your worst day a kind word from a friend, an acquaintance or even a stranger can wipe it all away. At home I check out my last blog and see warm comments from women who get it. I smile.
9pm - hubby comes home from work and we raid the bar. I'm surprised I can type at all. I tasted the Sambucca, I sipped the Bailey's, tequila, vermouth and something else I can't remember the name of. I have had about a shot glass worth of booze and I am tipsy. I really am a cheap date.
Now I am drinking a vodka and orange - a whole glass full. Am thinking the morning meeting might have to be rescheduled.
I'm typing but I am legless. There are 15 steps to be climbed and I am laughing at the thought of it. Hubby thinks I have lost my mind - or drunk. His eyes light up I shoot him down. Not tonight Josephine.
Life is funny.
Day 3 begins with a coffee..... ahhhhhhhhh! I can't wait.
Autumn
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
The Holiday is O V E R!
Yes it is. It is soooooo over that I will be going to bed at 9.30 tonight and crying myself to sleep.
After 10 months at home on Long service Leave - (I love Australia) I went back to work today.
I had a gazillion resolutions about how I would act and what I planned to do with things when I got there. Most important I had resolved to keep my cool and present a more composed and dignified persona.
I was picked up by a colleague who was filling in for me and had my work car. I lasted till we got to the office carpark and I saw a car parked IN MY SPOT!!!!!! MY spot. The spot that has a name plate behind it on the wall that has MY name on it and MY Title. MINE! MY spot! Internally I just blew up. But I managed to keep it together a few more minutes. I made a comment but I kept it cool.
Then I got inside. 30 minutes later I cannot log on to the network because my account has been DISABLED! Disabled? Are they trying to tell me something. Ok so I limp a little when I am really REALLY sore but DISABLED?!?
4 phone calls and 3 hours later I am live. 800 emails await. Thank you Tracey for cleaning most of them up for me. But still 800? I settle in with my Mocha Latte to clean them up.
Then someone comes and in and tells me I'm needed outside. Why? Well apparently someone has collapsed outside our building after leaving reception. An Ambulance has been called. I want to say 'so?'. But I remember that I am the boss. It is 12.30 by now. I am hungry and was gonna eat my sandwich ( thank you hubby) drink my latte and delete emails. Instead I am standing outside in 30+ degree heat with 10 bystanders hovering and 2 ambulance officers working. They take the lady to hospital and I am left with her 2 young children and half dozen bystanders all trying to help.
Long story short the kids are finally collected at 4.15pm. My conference room, where I had them camped out, looks like - oh hell what do you think two bored kids with whiteboard markers, 4 bags of chips and a giant cookie would leave my conference room looking like? At least the crumbs can be vacuumed by the cleaner - blue marker on my pristine walls is another story.
I spent my entire afternoon between calls and the conference room. I never got to those emails or the files on my desk.
Day 1 failed. It failed spectacularly. I lost my cool a couple of times.
4.30pm. I say 'fuck it, I'm going home'. I am tired already, my joints are screaming from standing outside for an hour and then parading back and forth to the conference room. I have a headache.
I go home and pour myself a vodka and orange and slam that down. Not enough! I dilute a pear cider with sprite and slam that down. I eat my dinner without even knowing I am eating as I narrate the days events to Big J and little j.
All of a sudden it is 9.30pm.
I'm off to bed. Must remember to take the phone with me since I am on-call. I call the after hours officer and threaten to shoot him if he wakes me tonight.
All in all a good first day don't you think?
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Oh crap.... hunneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee can I have a scotch and coke please?
Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better,Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better.
It better be.
After 10 months at home on Long service Leave - (I love Australia) I went back to work today.
I had a gazillion resolutions about how I would act and what I planned to do with things when I got there. Most important I had resolved to keep my cool and present a more composed and dignified persona.
I was picked up by a colleague who was filling in for me and had my work car. I lasted till we got to the office carpark and I saw a car parked IN MY SPOT!!!!!! MY spot. The spot that has a name plate behind it on the wall that has MY name on it and MY Title. MINE! MY spot! Internally I just blew up. But I managed to keep it together a few more minutes. I made a comment but I kept it cool.
Then I got inside. 30 minutes later I cannot log on to the network because my account has been DISABLED! Disabled? Are they trying to tell me something. Ok so I limp a little when I am really REALLY sore but DISABLED?!?
4 phone calls and 3 hours later I am live. 800 emails await. Thank you Tracey for cleaning most of them up for me. But still 800? I settle in with my Mocha Latte to clean them up.
Then someone comes and in and tells me I'm needed outside. Why? Well apparently someone has collapsed outside our building after leaving reception. An Ambulance has been called. I want to say 'so?'. But I remember that I am the boss. It is 12.30 by now. I am hungry and was gonna eat my sandwich ( thank you hubby) drink my latte and delete emails. Instead I am standing outside in 30+ degree heat with 10 bystanders hovering and 2 ambulance officers working. They take the lady to hospital and I am left with her 2 young children and half dozen bystanders all trying to help.
Long story short the kids are finally collected at 4.15pm. My conference room, where I had them camped out, looks like - oh hell what do you think two bored kids with whiteboard markers, 4 bags of chips and a giant cookie would leave my conference room looking like? At least the crumbs can be vacuumed by the cleaner - blue marker on my pristine walls is another story.
I spent my entire afternoon between calls and the conference room. I never got to those emails or the files on my desk.
Day 1 failed. It failed spectacularly. I lost my cool a couple of times.
4.30pm. I say 'fuck it, I'm going home'. I am tired already, my joints are screaming from standing outside for an hour and then parading back and forth to the conference room. I have a headache.
I go home and pour myself a vodka and orange and slam that down. Not enough! I dilute a pear cider with sprite and slam that down. I eat my dinner without even knowing I am eating as I narrate the days events to Big J and little j.
All of a sudden it is 9.30pm.
I'm off to bed. Must remember to take the phone with me since I am on-call. I call the after hours officer and threaten to shoot him if he wakes me tonight.
All in all a good first day don't you think?
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Oh crap.... hunneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee can I have a scotch and coke please?
Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better,Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better, Day 2 will be better.
It better be.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Cleaning the kitchen like a man....
....means:
I wish I were a ladybug - seems a serene sort of life....
Oh, now we've switched to Ice Hockey - now THAT'S a real game !!!! Pffffrrrrrrt! Don't mind me I'll just be hanging out the washing...... By the way what's for dinner? Answer: take away! Bingo!
- putting the bread and jam away but not the butter.
- washing the roasting pan and putting it ON TOP of all the DRY tupperware already in the draining board.
- taking out the trash but leaving behind the recycling and the compost.
- wiping down the cooktop but leaving the dirty spoon rest on the side.
- stacking all dirty items in the dishwasher EXCEPT for the giant coffee cup right in front of you (and the aforementioned spoon rest)
- wiping down the bench but leaving all the scraps and soap scum in the sink
- leaving a clean saucepan on the stove top - for later I guess.
- brushing the toast crumbs from under the toaster onto the floor (WHICH I VACUUMMED AND MOPPED YESTERDAY!!!!!) (how the hell do you spell vaccummed, vaccuummed, vacuummed, ah hell with it)
- soaking the floor while washng the roasting pan which is too big to go in the dishwasher and then using the dish towel to mop up only half of it.
- putting the now filthy and soaking dish towel back on the hook - eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!
- proudly announcing that you have 'cleaned' the kitchen for 'me'!!!
- sitting down to watch a bunch of pansies in head to toe padding and helmets play "football" while your wife cleans the kitchen up FOR REAL!!
I wish I were a ladybug - seems a serene sort of life....
Oh, now we've switched to Ice Hockey - now THAT'S a real game !!!! Pffffrrrrrrt! Don't mind me I'll just be hanging out the washing...... By the way what's for dinner? Answer: take away! Bingo!
Monday, January 9, 2012
I wish I were a tree......
Oh, I wish I were a tree,majestic, soaring free;
my tips to touch the sky,
scolding birds that pass me by.
I wish my roots were deepwhen monsters scream my name
and memories inflame.
I wish my leaves would falland shed bad memories all;
so I could bloom anew
in Spring's fresh morning dew.
Yes I wish I were a tree
so you could look at me
and know just what it takes
to overcome mistakes.
My bark's a history
of storms that battered me,
yet holds me up in place
to join the human race.
Oh I wish I were a tree
so none could bother me,
but even for a tree
the chainsaw waits with glee....
Marlia Boyce January 9, 2012
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
The black and white of it.....
These past 3 days the temperature has been in the high 30s (90s F) and yesterday we cracked 40 (104).
It was danged HOT. And as I wilted the world of nature exploded.
My Black Hoya erupted in dozens of glorious pods with a delicate aroma. This plant has been in a 50cm square pot for 15 years. It is root bound beyond comprehension and yet every year this is what I get. I want so much to repot or transplant it but I am scared I will destroy it. Is it possible to feel sad for a plant. I worry that it is suffering in the pot. I worry that it sometimes dries out and doesnt exactly look healthy each year. It has covered the wall of the front porch and has even woven itself behind the gutters. I don't care. I love it and it stays!
At least I had the presence of mind to put up a trellis when I first sited it there.
Hoya flowers from the same flower spike every year. The spike (no idea what the proper word for it is) grows by one layer each year. So you can see in the pic below here that I do not lie when I say it has been there for 15 years.
In contrast is this white hydrangea flowers from new growth each year. It needs to be pruned and pruned hard but it gives its all in gratitude.
When I am sad I turn to plants. When I am mad I turn to plants. And when I am happy I return to plants.
What a wonderful planet we have. These next 3 pics are from a friend's house where I spent the gap between christmas and New Year. These are her views......... what bliss!
It was danged HOT. And as I wilted the world of nature exploded.
My Black Hoya erupted in dozens of glorious pods with a delicate aroma. This plant has been in a 50cm square pot for 15 years. It is root bound beyond comprehension and yet every year this is what I get. I want so much to repot or transplant it but I am scared I will destroy it. Is it possible to feel sad for a plant. I worry that it is suffering in the pot. I worry that it sometimes dries out and doesnt exactly look healthy each year. It has covered the wall of the front porch and has even woven itself behind the gutters. I don't care. I love it and it stays!
At least I had the presence of mind to put up a trellis when I first sited it there. Hoya flowers from the same flower spike every year. The spike (no idea what the proper word for it is) grows by one layer each year. So you can see in the pic below here that I do not lie when I say it has been there for 15 years.
 |
| new growth flowering as it hangs in the air looking for purchase. |
In contrast is this white hydrangea flowers from new growth each year. It needs to be pruned and pruned hard but it gives its all in gratitude.
When I am sad I turn to plants. When I am mad I turn to plants. And when I am happy I return to plants.
What a wonderful planet we have. These next 3 pics are from a friend's house where I spent the gap between christmas and New Year. These are her views......... what bliss!
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